My conservative, strict, asian family wants to ensure that I am not exposed to anything about "s e x" that they refrained me from participating in sex-ed class. To them, topics related to "s e x" are considered shameful. It's something to never ever be discussed about at home or anywhere else. I did once ask my mom where I came from and she said, her armpit ! And it can only happen after you get married. OK ! And I wasn't thinking about getting marry anytime soon so I never doubted her or inquire more about where baby came from.The internet wasn't around then so I couldn't just google up a question and get thousands of sites responding with answers. Majority of my friends were asian, we don't talk about "those stuff" ...come to think of it...they might be just as clueless as me ! So there I was, pretty much in my own bubble, venturing through high school, at lost on a lot of things.
Looking back at my teenage years, I am glad the Lord watched over me. I'm quite glad my insecurities about myself and not knowing how to kiss prevented me from dating. If someone likes me, I make sure it's a phone "relationship". And I usually end it within a week so we don't have to go on an alone date. I was terrify of one on one date. Hence I never been on one. Which was good ! Man, with my cluelessness and teenage boy hormones, I could be a teenage mom with a few kids already back then !!!!!!!!!! yikes !
Things are a lot different now. We're pretty much living in an x-rated world ! The onscreen tv kisses that my mom used to make me shield my eyes from, are now child's play. On top of tv shows stretching their limits, we now have access to everything at our finger tips. Adult ads are EVERYWHERE on the net. I can't keep Honeybee in a bubble even if I want to !!! Kids are exposed to all sorts of things at such a young age. I know I know, not everything is bad but surely one must have to do their diligent to filter through the bad to find the goods (tv shows, internet sites, apps, games, etc)
As a parent, we just have to keep up with all the technology changes, have to keep watch over our kids at all time. If we don't, no one is. At times I wonder if it's even worth my time to talk about abstinence-until-marriage to Honeybee (which I will). I believe in it strongly and hope she will at least hear me out and hear the reason for it. Just because society say what is now the NORM doesn't mean it is. Just because everyone is doing it doesn't mean we should participate. People know about AIDS, about STD, about herpes, and about other sexually transmitted disease YET there are many still think 1 night stand with a stranger is completely OK and acceptable. Condom isn't 100% ! ok, 99% "safe" most of the time, but you can be the 1% !!! I know I sound like prude but I so long for my daughters to give themselves away to the right guy :)
I am planning on getting some books on how to effectively talk to my Honeybee about sex. I need to convey it to her in an honest and factual way. My upbringing might cause me to either overshare or under-share, so a lot preparation is needed. As of now, I found myself still not comfortable talking about the subject :-S yes, even at 33 ! Sad I know !
